Divided Soul
by Kihin Ranno
Summary: Endymion confides in Kunzite during a rare moment of respite, and Kunzite answers questions he never asked.


Divided Soul  
Written for the Sailor Moon Monthly Fanfiction Challenge  
December Challenge - Day One: Image  
by Kihin Ranno  
1/1

_Man has daylight and darkness, summer and winter, peace and war, and life and death. In order to remember this lesson of life, look to the great eagle, the favorite bird of the Great Spirit. The eagle feather is divided into two parts, part light and part dark. This represents daylight and darkness, summer and winter, peace and war, and life and death._

The life of a Prince was not always easy and rarely restful. His days were often filled with education of the mind, the body, and on some occasions, on the heart or at least the rules of courtship. These lessons can be relentless and never-ending, and Endymion never dared to hope that one of his teachers would decide to leave him alone for the day. His parents were not yet old, but there was always the threat of a sudden ascension to the throne through war or sudden illness, and Prince Endymion had to be prepared.

At the moment, Endymion was repeating that truth to himself as a mantra. Without it, he was quite sure he would not have made it to the training arena to meet with his four Shitennou. Years ago, a master swordsman had taught them the tricks of the trade. But astonishingly to all except those who knew him, Kunzite had managed to surpass him at an early age. Ever since then, this portion of Endymion's training had been set to Kunzite. His four pupils were still wondering whether or not this was a development they favored.

When Endymion reached the arena, Kunzite was nowhere to be seen. This was surprising, but everything else seemed fairly typical. As usual, Zoisite was bent over papers, scratching music notes onto a parchment Endymion would never be allowed to see, although he would likely hear it the next time a visiting diplomat stopped by. And Jadeite and Nephrite were sparring once again, tossing challenges and insults ranging from the cutting to the ridiculous back and forth. Although it should be noted that Nephrite was rarely cutting and Jadeite never ridiculous.

"I thought you said you'd practiced with that thing?" Jadeite challenged, practicing footwork too intricate for the situation but perfect for an upcoming exhibition where boasting was of course paramount.

Nephrite narrowed his eyes and growled, sounding something like a puppy whose tail had just been stepped on. He didn't seem to be practicing anything except maybe taking Jadeite's head off. "Do you remember when I warned you that your damn smirk might get stuck on your face? The prophecy has come to pass."

Jadeite laughed, eyes flashing. "You had to look to the stars for that?"

"No, just your mother."

The sword fight continued for a few seconds, but it was quickly abandoned in favor of the boyish wrestling of their youth. It was more Nephrite's style of fighting, brute strength over agility, and he quickly got the upperhand and Jadeite in a headlock.

"Agh!" Jadeite shouted. "When is the last time you bathed?"

This would have continued for some time yet had Zoisite not looked up and seen Endymion slumped in the doorway. He raised an eyebrow and remained where he sat, but it was obvious he was concerned. "Endymion?"

Jadeite and Nephrite halted their scuffle, looking up in comic unison. They seemed an awful lot like children who had been caught stealing sweets from the kitchen before dinner. Of course, Nephrite still did that.

"Wow," Nephrite said, still holding Jadeite in a headlock.

"You look like shit," Jadeite said bluntly. "What did they do to you today?"

"Tea ceremonies," Endymion stated with a long sigh. "Hours and hours of tea ceremonies."

Nephrite made a face, and finally remembered Jadeite when the other man managed to kick him in the back of the knee. "That sounds awful."

"It **is** awful," Endymion assured him. "Apparently, just the way I hold my teacup can start an endless war of epic proportions."

Jadeite smiled cynically. "The fate of a nation rests on whether or not you have enough sugar and lemon in stock."

"I suppose we're doomed then," Zoisite joked. "Lemon is number twelve on the list of things you're going to outlaw when you're king."

Endymion shook his head, fondly remembering the list they had been compiling since they were young. At last count, they were up to 346. "Forget lemon. I'll just ban tea ceremonies altogether. That will solve everything."

"That's taking the easy way out," a familiar voice pronounced from off to the left.

Endymion turned, straightening out of respect for the voice's owner. It was Kunzite, who had apparently been there from the very beginning, observing from a shadow Endymion hadn't noticed before. Kunzite was an expert at being unobtrusive, which was quite a feat given his height and his pale coloring. Everything about the man was imposing, and yet he had always won in their childhood games of hide-'n'-seek.

"I like the easy way," Endymion insisted. He felt rather like pouting, but he knew Kunzite would never stand for that. He almost told Zoisite to do it for him. He was better at it anyway.

Kunzite shook his head and stepped out of the shadows. "Master, I've told you before. The simplest method may be the best for now, but as a long-term solution, it is rarely beneficial."

"And what exactly are the long-term benefits of tea ceremonies?" Endymion demanded.

Kunzite smirked, and Endymion knew that he was beaten before he even knew why. "Your wife will love them."

Endymion didn't even try to think of something remotely clever to say to that. Jadeite would have kept going for another hour no matter how badly he was fairing, but Endymion saw no reason to engage Kunzite any further on the subject. He'd already lost.

"I really hate it when you're right," Endymion grumbled childishly.

"You must hate me quite often then," Kunzite joked.

He had done it so smoothly that Endymion almost missed it. He blinked and then smiled, just to be certain it was understood that he had meant no harm. It was probably a wasted gesture. Of course Kunzite knew that.

"In any event, I have to say I agree with Jadeite," Kunzite continued briskly. "You look like shit, Master."

Endymion's shoulders sagged. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," Kunzite responded. He observed Endymion for a moment and then shook his head, defeated. "Well, you're going to be useless today."

Zoisite's head perked up, instantly recognizing where this was going. "Useless enough to have the day off?"

Nephrite's eyes lit up so that he looked as though he were actually glowing. "Really? A day off? Really, Kunzite?"

Kunzite sighed, sounding every bit like a loving, if mildly disappointed patriarch. "I suppose I do. But if you ever suggest this again, I'll make you run beginner level drills for the next week. Understood?"

Nephrite saluted, clearly restraining himself from jumping up and down. "Yes sir, Kunzite, sir!"

Jadeite yanked Nephrite's arm down. "Don't be so eager. He might change his mind."

"And try to make you work after telling you that you could rest?" Kunzite asked. "Not likely." He started to walk out of the arena, beckoning for the others to follow. "We'd better make ourselves scarce. This is precisely why they were so hesitant about putting me in charge in the first place."

"They were actually worried about you being too lenient?" Endymion asked incredulously, trailing after him. "Have you been introduced?"

It was decided that it was best just to leave the castle grounds altogether. Jadeite expertly came up with the idea that they were going out to the forest in order to practice combat in difficult terrain, an exercise they had done before with varying amounts of success. They mounted their horses and traveled out into the woods, stopping once they reached a river far enough off the trail so that they would not be spotted easily.

Zoisite immediately sat against a tree to continue work on his next masterpiece, and Jadeite and Nephrite went off by themselves with promises to come back and harass Zoisite later. They would only indulge his hermit tendencies so much. This left Kunzite and Endymion on their own, which was probably as it should be.

Endymion sighed in contentment, flopping down into the grass. "You have no idea how grateful I am."

"Nephrite and Zoisite have given me a vague idea," Kunzite said wryly. "And don't think that I'm going easy on you. You've been exceptionally busy as of late. If I were to make you work today, you wouldn't learn anything, and you'd more than likely get hurt. Better that I give you one day than have you take twenty."

Endymion stared at the leader of his guard in amazement. "You really don't spare anyone, do you?"

Kunzite looked down at him, mildly chiding. "I think you already know the answer to that, Master."

Endymion sighed. "I suppose I do."

The pair sat in a companionable silence for some time, and that was more than preferable for Endymion. Talking with Kunzite was rarely a relaxing pastime. He forced Endymion to think and defend every position, and while Endymion was grateful to Kunzite for that and far more, it was taxing. Endymion was more than happy to sit back in the grass and listen to the sounds of the forest for awhile, and he was glad not to do it alone.

It was at least an hour before another word was spoken. Predictably, Endymion was the one to break the quiet.

"I'm glad you're here," Endymion said, practically whispering to convey his sincerity.

It was inappropriate to say that Kunzite was surprised, but he clearly hadn't been expecting Endymion to say much of anything, let alone that. His eyebrows arched subtly. "What do you mean?"

Endymion had been hoping that the one sentence would be enough, but he really ought to have known better. "I mean… I'm glad you're here. Not just sitting here, but that you're around at all."

Kunzite was looking at him strangely. "Where else would I be?"

It was just that sort of answer that made Endymion grateful for Kunzite's presence. Endymion pushed himself up onto his elbows. "I just… I just think I would have gone mad or gotten myself killed if you weren't here to look out for me. The others are…" Endymion trailed off, already feeling Kunzite's disapproving gaze on him. "I appreciate them more than I can say. They're my friends and my guard, and I would never speak ill of them. You know that. But you're just… different somehow. Better."

"Stop," Kunzite said, all at once stern.

Endymion looked up at him, a little hurt. "I just--"

"I understand, Master," Kunzite assured him. "And I am grateful. But there are things about us you must understand."

"Like what?" Endymion demanded, his cheeks flushed.

Kunzite turned from him for a moment to gather his thoughts. For a few minutes, silence pervaded once more. All they heard was the river and the animals of the forest. A deer sneaking through the trees. A fish jumping out of the water. An eagle calling overhead.

The final sound is what seemed to spur Kunzite's thoughts. "Do you know what an eagle feather represents?"

Endymion narrowed his eyes. "No, I can't say that's been covered in my studies."

"Duality," Kunzite explained, ignoring Endymion's hostility. "Its feathers are equally light and dark. There are people who believe that an eagle feather can represent all of mankind. Neither wholly good nor wholly evil."

It was Endymion's turn to be confused. "I don't understand."

Kunzite frowned. "None of us are completely good, Master. We all have our faults, and you must understand this."

Endymion blinked. "Kunzite, don't be ridiculous. Of course I know you're not--"

"You think you do, but you know nothing," Kunzite countered, sounding a bit sad.

"Then explain it to me," Endymion insisted.

Kunzite looked over at Zoisite, who was too far away from them physically and mentally to overhear. "Think on Zoisite for a moment. You no doubt see him as well-meaning and a little immature. Talented, soft-spoken, content with being an introvert. Yes?"

Endymion nodded.

"This also makes him easily prone to suggestion," Kunzite explained. "He doesn't act. He reacts. He wants to please everyone, a trait that can be problematic."

Endymion stared. "But that doesn't--"

"Nephrite is quick to leap to yours or anyone else's defense," Kunzite went on. "He also jumps to conclusions. He's easily tricked and impulsive. He can be dangerous in combat to be sure, but that could be just as easily detrimental as it is beneficial."

"Kunzite--"

"And Jadeite is just the sort of man I want beside me in a battle. He's also the last person I want to stand against me," Kunzite said, his voice not at all frantic but still quick. "As long as he is loyal, he is your friend. That's exactly what would make him your worst enemy."

"Enough!" Endymion snapped, sitting straight up. He was glaring at Kunzite openly, something he never would have dared do before that day. "Why are you telling me this?"

Kunzite closed his eyes. "Because if you think I am the best, then it is entirely possible that I could be the worst as well."

Endymion gaped. This was not at all how he pictured this conversation going. He shook his head in denial. "No… No, you're not--"

"There are things that even you do not know about me, Master," Kunzite maintained.

"But you would never hurt me," Endymion said with conviction. "Never. I know that much about you. You can't deny that Kunzite."

Kunzite shook his head. "I am a divided soul, Master. As are we all. You should not be blinded by your affections."

"I'm not!" Endymion shouted, leaping to his feet. "I know you!"

Endymion's voice echoed throughout the forest, catching Zoisite's attention and even bringing Jadeite and Nephrite back from wherever they had been. Naturally, Jadeite was the most suspicious. "Everything all right?"

Endymion looked down at Kunzite, expecting him to answer. But Kunzite said nothing.

"A minor disagreement," Endymion said, his voice tight. "Nothing more."

"Didn't sound minor to me," Nephrite muttered.

"Quiet!" Zoisite hissed, trying to keep the peace.

Kunzite stood up, looking down at the ground thoughtfully. After a moment, he laid a hand on Endymion's shoulder, briefly squeezing it. He met Endymion's eyes, and the intensity within was staggering. "Just remember what I said, Master."

Endymion did not respond, nor did Kunzite actually expect one. There was no question over whether or not Endymion would remember. It was impossible to forget.

Kunzite turned and walked off, to think on matters Endymion couldn't even begin to speculate on. He wanted to call him back and tell him that he was wrong. All of them were good, Kunzite more than any of them. He had been brought up to be wary of everyone, but his Shitennou were never anything to worry about. They were his comrades and his protectors. They were also his only friends. He had no reason to mistrust them, and he had no idea why Kunzite would suggest otherwise.

But Endymion said nothing.

"Say, Zoisite," Jadeite said loudly, attracting Endymion's attention. "Does Kunzite like tea ceremonies?"

"Eh?" Nephrite said. "Jadeite, what are you--"

"Why yes, Jadeite," Zoisite answered, talking above Nephrite. "One might even go so far as to say that he loves them."

"I thought so," Jadeite said, his wicked smile audible in his voice. "So, Endymion. When were you going to tell us about you two?"

"I should hope you weren't planning on eloping. I would be deeply hurt if I couldn't write the wedding music," Zoisite continued.

"What are you **talking** about?" Nephrite asked. "Kunzite and Endymion aren't—Ew. God, I can't even think about it."

Endymion sighed, turning around to face his other three men. Things were not settled between him and Kunzite, but he couldn't very well ignore this elaborate attempt to cheer him up. Besides, it was beginning to work. "You do realize that I'm going to have to kill you now."

Jadeite laughed. "Please. What's the little prince going to do? I'm more afraid of your wife than I am of you."

Nephrite was beginning to look green. "Jadeite, seriously, that's disgusting."

"As I recall, the little prince in question has kicked your ass on numerous occasions," Endymion said. "And he would be more than happy to do it again."

"Just try it," Jadeite challenged.

It was all Endymion needed. The war began instantaneously, Nephrite fighting alongside the prince against Zoisite and Jadeite to regain Endymion's honor. At one point amidst the chaos, Endymion looked up in the direction where Kunzite had gone. He couldn't see the pale leader of his guard, but Endymion knew that he was there, watching from the shadows.


End file.
